thankful

here i am...my blogging debut....i had some thoughts today on the weather. on sidewalk cafes. on the ‘life-buzzy, its-almost-officially-spring’ vibe here in new york today. and so i thought to myself, maybe today-TODAY-i shall blog. since, after all, this is supposed to be a blog about living in new york city. and all of the joys and sorrows and annoyances and beautiful moments that come with that. so here i am, coming up on my nyc one year anniversary (in june), beginning what i hope will be a log of my musings on life here in my beloved city.

so today i did eighteen loads of laundry (not really, but almost). there is a laundromat around the corner from my apartment, quite close actually, but when you are carrying 4 small children (ie: 2 large bags of laundry) it feels like you are walking to jersey. so i carried the bags to the laundromat, with the help of Helpful Roomie, and entered in to the very smallish, very smellyish, very humid room, which, b/c it’s sunday, was crammed with people. sigh. i then spent the next two to three hours in this place, waiting and sighing and sweating and reading. i had to fight a Jamaican nurse for the next free dryer (well, my version of fighting which consists of "ummm, excuse me -- i was going to use that. you see, i was kind of here first, and i have been waiting a very long time..." etc. etc.).

after laundry there was church with a friend, and walking and talking....walking home around 8ish up second avenue, past the restaurants and the outdoor seating, past friends and lovers catching up over red wine and margaritas, i couldn’t help but smile (and believe me, i am NOT normally that person - the person who smiles to them self on the street. sometimes as i walk past these laughing people eating and drinking, i feel pangs of jealousy. where is MY love? where are MY friends? MY family? scattered far and wide is the answer -- a result of my restlessness and meanderings. and then i feel sad). but tonight....joy swelled up in me as i walked past all of these lovely little places and lovely people. it’s getting warmer and trees are budding and this is NEW YORK for pete’s sake!! and THAT is why i just had to smile to myself. b/c i realized (and this realization hits every now and again and i am glad when it does) that i really like my life. and that i am very lucky. i get to live in this great big buzzy city. and i love it. new york is like the puzzle piece i was looking for for so long. when i moved here, it felt like something finally clicked. home. it’s not quite as nice as that home-click you get with THAT someone you love. that is fuller and cozier and more colorful. but this is a close second.

and so tonight, as i walked toward my building, and waved to my favorite waiters who work at the cozy Italian restaurant below us, i felt such a peace and a feeling of thankfulness wash over me. i am thankful that i am renewing my lease for another year with the aforementioned helpful roomie who is also super-fun and amazing. and i am thankful that nyc and i are as close as we are, and that we seem to be establishing for ourselves a healthy and happy romance that i hope will last a long, long time.