Another List, Velo Binding, etc.

Today I very much disliked:

1) micromanagement
2) condescension
3) velo binding

All of these things equaled (=ed) a Very Bad Day.

After work I went up to my rooftop, sat on a ledge and sketched the city. And the sky. And a cartoon of my co-worker as a bumble bee with a very sharp and long stinger. Ouch. Now I feel better :)

the weekend

well, it was a busy one ladies and gents. but full of fun and sun and laughs. my very dear friend, dillon, and her friends came up from maryland over the holiday weekend to take manhattan by storm...and i tagged along for the adventures. over the course of three days there was soho and little italy and central park and times square and upper west side and upper east side and yummy eats and the apple store (see previous post)...and probably more that i am not remembering. it is fun when out-of-towners are in town b/c it forces me to get out and see my city. and what a great city it is.

on a roll!

TWO celebrity sightings in ONE week!! that's gotta be some kind of record or something! (for me -- definitely). even though i kind of mooched this one, which tends to be my "way" (maybe one day i will actually see and recognize a celeb all by myself)...

Who: Dave Chapelle
When: earlier tonight, around midnight
Where: Fifth Avenue Apple store. i had heard that the celebs sometimes "hang" there, but didn't believe it b/c it's always so crammed with people/tourists. i guess the trick is to go VERY late on the sunday night of a holiday weekend.
Celebrity sightings to date: (2)

A List.

Reasons Why I Felt Like Giving Up On The Whole Music Thing Last Night**:

1- showed up at 8 -- acoustic guitar slung over left shoulder, rarin' to go in my pretty little black dress and flip-flops. on stage was a death metal/hip-hop "band" -- all male, except for one small, skittish female who occasionally moaned into the microphone and beat a tambourine against her leg. but mostly she just trotted around the stage. this was the "band" i was to follow.

2- ordered one drink --vodka & tonic, good for warmin' up the vocal chords -- drink was NOT on the house, even though i was taking the stage in a matter of minutes -- drink was definitely TEN DOLLARS and served in a glass approximately 4 inches tall.

3- sound system was indescribably HORRIBLE. sound man completely unaware of highs v. lows, or volume control for that matter. any time i requested anything ("could you please turn my guitar down?") i was met with a blank stare, to which i finally responded, "okaaay. i guess i'll just start then." so i did. my guitar pretty much sounded like a small animal being tortured. although i was told it improved as i kept playing.

4- only two people showed up for me (my 2 faithful and super-supportive friends who i hugged desperately upon arrival), despite my efforts of "self-promotion" (which i hate). the girl who was scheduled to play after me was surrounded by hordes of friends and fans, which made me really miss my friends who are scattered far and wide. and made me wish i had a manager or a PR person or SOMEONE who could convince people to come to my shows...

5- at a whopping $1.50 a head, i made approximately $3 for the night. upon collection, the guy felt so sorry for me, he gave me $5 instead. pity money.

6- i left in tears, missing my friends, cursing this horrible venue, and cursing my decision to follow this crazy dream.

--and that concludes the list--

(today, i am over it -- for the most part)

**i played a solo set at a bar (whose name i will not mention) located on the Upper East Side of Manhattan.

happy day

i am so excited! my new journaling bible came in the mail today (too much free time at work = impulsive, whimsical --sometimes random-- internet purchases. bibles included). this little black book combines two of my favorite things: bible-ing and journaling. it's cute, the perfect size, AND has a handy-dandy elastic strap. it's very moleskin-like in appearance and feel, which is probably why i love it so. now -- hopefully -- this will inspire me to actually BE in the Word more. we shall see...

Celebrity (non) Sightings

So apparently, on my way to lunch today, I walked right past Wesley Snipes **WITHOUT NOTICING** because I am "The Oblivious One" (although I somehow managed to notice the man on the street mouthing to his wife "W-E-S-L-E-Y...S-N-I-P-E-S!!" which is how I was clued into what was happening. Her response: "Wha-a-a-t?" along with a blank stare. I am that wife.) ::sigh:: This is my curse. I live in a city full of celebrities, but am too wrapped up in my own happenings to notice. Today it was chatting with a friend on the ol' cell phone while swiftly and wildly dodging bodies (Wesley) so as to get to Bryant Park as quickly as possible in order to make the most out of my rapidly diminishing lunch hour. Truth be told though, if I had run right into the man, I'm not sure I would have recognized Mr. Snipes (please don't tell him I said so)...

Celebrity sightings to date: (1)
Who: Diane Sawyer
When: Last Sunday, May 20th
Where: Waverly and Bank, Greenwich Village

Train Crazees

Let me just say, the No. 5 express train was in rare form this morning. I mean, it is not uncommon to see some "unusual activity" here and there on the trains, but for the most part my morning commute is pretty average. There are days that it is so quiet, the only sound to be heard is the buzz of the AC and the clanking of metal on tracks. And then there are days that you feel as if you've stepped right into a circus. Or a Southern Baptist tent revival meeting. Today was one of those days.
First of all, it was super-crowded, more so than usual I would say (and I was annoyed because nobody offered their seat to the little old man standing next to me, who was hanging onto the railing for dear life with his skinny little arms -- come on people! That's like, Train Etiquette 101. Geez.) I was focused on the old man and not really paying much attention to the preacher at first. We'll call him Brother Crazy Train Man. Brother Crazy Train Man was already on a roll when I stepped on, but grew more fervent as the train picked up speed. In addition to the preaching (which included, but was not limited to 1) the Condemning Of Sinners and 2) a call to love one another), there was also a brief poetry reading and a spiritual sing-along thrown in for good measure (which people actually participated in! Wha--?!) I didn't think it could get any weirder, when suddenly, one passenger began antagonizing Brother Crazy Train Man, yelling threats and debating the state of his salvation (while also assuring the whole train car that he was not, in fact, a pervert. Okay.) Somehow, somewhere just beyond the 59th Street station, a heated discussion about Paris Hilton and her recent conviction began between this man (the non-pervert) and Brother Crazy Train Man. (Seriously - I couldn’t make this stuff up even if I tried). So the Great Paris Debate continued as we approached Grand Central Station, where sadly, I had to get off and miss the rest of the show (but not without hearing this final declaration from Brother Crazy Train Man: "I am A-NOINTED! YOU just DIS-A-PPOINTED!") I definitely had an extra spring in my step as I exited the train and headed to work, because a) I am wearing my new rocket dog shoes and they are very cute and comfortable, b) sometimes I may feel emotional and out of sorts and a bit "crazy," but at least I am not as crazy as those 2 crazees, and c) I live in the greatest city in the world. Seriously.

The Day Off

What a delightful Monday! Maybe that had something to do with the fact that I was given an Unexpected Day Off--maybe...(or maybe I am still reeling from such a great weekend: time spent away from the city in the heart of Amish Country, PA for some fresh air & stars, and a gig last night back in the city at The Bitter End, among other things). There are so many mornings that I walk by coffee shops and bookstores and think to myself, if only I didn't have to work... the possibilities and ideas of what I could do with my day are endless in those moments. So, given that I had been *given* this gift of a day off (thanks, bosses), I decided to actually do some of those things. Well, first, there was sleeping in. Then there was reading and journaling and cereal and coffee and emailing. Then, around 1ish, I decided it was time to be out and about (weather report: 71 degrees, mostly sunny = perfect). First stop: Serendipity's Nail & Spa for a pedicure -- summer is HERE people, gotta take care of those tootsies. Next stop: Barnes & Noble on E. 86th where 1 (one) book was purchased: Anne Rice's Christ the Lord: Out of Egypt. Then, I traveled down to Astor Place, a spot I have always wanted to explore, where I purchased 1 (one) pair of Rocket Dog sneakers (on sale for $19 - can't beat that) at a strange, goth/hippie kind of shop. Then I sat in a box of glass (the Astor Place Starbucks) at a very pinnacle point in the city: the point in which Astor, 3rd Ave., Cooper and St. Marks Place all converge. All sorts of people-watching to be done in this spot. Then it was off to Union Square (with a quick stop at Utrecht Art Supplies to buy some *special* pens), where I had some park meandering to do, and apparently some more book shopping to do, since I found myself in yet another Barnes & Noble (my favorite B&N in the city), where I purchased 3 (three!) more books and a beautiful, chunky, hand-made journal from Nepal. I am not really sure what happened or why I bought so much, but it seems I couldn't resist: Honeymoon With My Brother, Blowing My Cover: My Life as a CIA Spy, and Delaying the Real World. From there, it was onto Carl Schultz Park which is right on the East River, where I sat on a bench and alternated between sketching in my new Nepali journal with my new *special* pens, and staring at the water. Heading home this evening, I rounded the corner of 2nd Avenue and 81st where a little girl of about 8 was teaching a couple of younger boys how to dance, specifically focusing on the Running Man and the Roger Rabbit. Needless to say, it was the perfect ending to the perfect day.

The Dry Erase Board

One time, a couple years back, my roommate at the time mapped out my entire life - past, present, and future - on a dry erase board. It was the most amazing thing anyone has ever done for me! It was like taking a class on ME! Seeing my path, and my mistakes, my heart and dreams -- all up there in orange and black marker (I'm not sure now why we used orange). Anyway, I found this website tonight that made me smile b/c 1) the entire site is written with a dry erase marker and made me remember my Dry Erase experience and 2) it is so very unique and creative and innovative. It is the site of performing artist/writer Miranda July. It made me feel like making a book or something. I love artists. I mean, I am an artist. But I love seeing creative people making new things, and putting themselves out there - it is very brave. And admirable. And quite inspiring for all of us other right-brained people floating around aimlessly, endlessly. It's like a rope to grab onto, to pull me back into the reality that I CAN DO THIS. I can make things too, and be my creative self, and flourish and thrive and be happy doing it. And when I forget that, inspiration is just one click away, on a blog or an artist's site. Or I suppose I could always dust off the ol' dry erase board and do a little life mapping.

Summer Breeze (makes me feel fine...)

Tonight is one of those perfect early-summer nights -- warm and breezy with low humidity, flip-flops and summer skirts galore! These are the kind of nights that make me feel like anything is possible. The warm wind whips my hair around my face, and I think...no...I believe with all my heart, that life is good and God is good and everything will be okay. A friend and I went to Spice tonight, and with our glasses full of fruity-Sangria-fun, we toasted New York in May: "Here's to summertime in New York!" And we couldn't help but smile and giggle as the words left our mouths. Because it is true that such a declaration deserves a toast and a smile -- and JOY! Even though the monotony of The Day Job gets old; even though my music isn't exactly taking off; even though the ol' love life is not really a "reality" per se...it is okay. I am okay. Because there is life to be lived and dinners to be had and summer breezes to be swept away in....and to THAT, I raise my glass.

Lovely Places...

There are some places in this city that I find so delightful, I just can't keep them to myself. And so, dear bloggers, I share those places with you now:

* Firenze Ristorante: the pasta dishes never disappoint, and the waiters make you feel like YOU are definitely their favorite customer. But the best part is the way the dark and cozy interior sweeps you away to a different time and place. There is always lots of red wine and laughter to be had at Firenze.

* Brandy's Piano Bar: love, love, LOVE this place! It's loud and crowded, but after a few cosmos and Elton John tunes, you won't really notice anymore. The perfect place for those who enjoy Singing Very Loud.

*DTUT: not just another cookie cutter coffee shop. When I make my quick morning stop on the way to work (chocolate croissant and small black coffee, please), I always look longingly at the bohemian patrons typing away on their macs. This artsy joint makes me want to be jobless just so I can sit in one of those cushy chairs all afternoon scribbling away in my journal. Think Central Perk.

* First Presbyterian Church located at 12 West 12th Street, in New York's charming Greenwich Village. Not my church, but I pass by it every week, and every week have the same reaction -- wonder-filled sighs. Its beauty makes me stop dead in my tracks. I want to dive head-first into the lush green lawn, or maybe just picnic on it, and I feel as if I could spend hours photographing the architecture and beautifully kempt grounds. It is a delight just to catch a glimpse of this historically rich place of worship. I've never even peeked inside, but the outside is enough to get it on my list this week. Impressive, eh?

Alone

today was one of those days where everything just felt...off. i went to one of the Tribeca Film Festival films this afternoon -- saw a series of short films entitled "Ulterior Motives." very interesting. i ended up going alone. which was fine, b/c i actually got a free ticket since i WAS alone. someone had only one extra ticket, and no one else could take it since they were with other people. soo, yes, there are some perks to being...alone...i didn't mind standing in that line by myself. didn't mind sitting in the theater alone (sometimes it is nice to go to a movie solo -- i kind of enjoy that). didn't mind walking to church alone, or walking home, stopping at the grocery store. alone.
it is when night falls. and i start thinking too much. then the aloneness feels thick. and overwhelming. and i want to call to the dark corners of my apartment, "okay you can come out now!" and pray that someone, HE, will come out from behind the sofa, with a soft smile, and rescue me from my lonely Sunday evening.
but, alas, it doesn't happen. and so i go back to my bowl of pasta and glass of red wine, Without A Trace flashing around my eyes, and hope that tomorrow will be better than today. that maybe the loneliness won't be so present. so thick. that tomorrow i will be thankful to be a swinging single gal in new york city. heh.